Chapter One

Session Seven

Danger and Demi see Dimtri talking with the halfling who has a number of mechanical parts on the big table as they enter the agency building. Dimtri seems to be wearing his coat as if he is about to head out or has just come in.

“You don’t have any other place better to do this repair?” questions Dimtri as he looks over at the door. Danger bursts out with drunken enthusiasm, “Hey there Smokey! Got a cigarette on ya? I might need one for later!” Making sure to wink hard on the word later.

Dimtri a bit annoyed pulls out a cig and hands it to Danger.

“This is the only table large enough for me to stand on and work. I ain’t doing this on the floor,” replies Dino Crocetti. “Who is this dark guy?”

“This is Danger, you didn’t have time to meet him the other day. He’s one of the new guys working for us,” answers Dimtri.

Danger looks over the table curiously, “This is some heavy duty equipment, takin’ on an army?” Then proceeds to let out a roaring belch.

“Ya well I don’t have all the parts. Guy tried to pawn it off as a complete gun, but I could tell without even touchin’ the thing. Worked out a good price for it.”

“Guess you got what you paid for? I know Smokey’s got what he paid for when I signed on! No fortune too vast, no fame too unsullen!”

“If I can get the missing parts, I can have this thing up and blowin’ limbs off in no time.”

“Whatever you say,” say Dimtri and turning towards the halfling, “Just don’t have this out by morning. And preferably by the time I get back.”

With a bit of a confused look the halfling asks, “You going out again? You just got back.”

With a renew vigor, “The night is young!” exclaims Danger.

“Yes, Excuse me I have to freshen up a bit.” Dimtri heads up stairs to his quarters.

“So where’d ya get tha gun shorty?” question Danger once again turning his curiosity upon the unassembled gun.

“Man never takes a breather. Huh? Oh, a shady seabee sahaguin down by the docks. My normal seller recommended him to me.”

“A fish face!”

“The do good work on engines. Ain’t much to look at though.”

Demi, who has been longing for this conversation to end finally chimes in. “Hey when you going to stop talkin’ and we get to some horizontal chacha.”

The two drunks make it up the stairs and into Demi’s room. “I seem to be struck with rigor mortis!”

“Show me watch you got!” Demi’s tail stings as it slaps Danger on the ass. “Ah! Wrong hole?! ...Not until I’m warmed up.” Then with nimble fingers Danger could have stolen her virginity and she wouldn’t even have known it was gone.

With a bit of arcana knowledge Demi makes Danger exclaim, “I didn’t know they taught mages that!?”

As Dimtri walks past the door to Demi’s room he hears the two. “Hey if she gives you any trouble go for the horns. If you ever seen calf wrestling you’ll know what I’m talking about.”

“Just wait and see what I can do with mage hand.” Again using his skills as a trained killer Danger pulls off a trick using Demi’s tail to his advantage to pull it off. “Yeah darling fly me to the moon!” Moments later Demi passes out, “You win big boy…” Danger himself barely stays awake to smoke a cigarette.




John hails a cab a block or so down from the pub and coffee shop he had visited. As John steps into the cab the driver, an ugly creature that would scare any human child asks, “Where to buddy?”

“The Brugundy part of town,” replies John.

“You got it.” Ten minutes later. The cab pulls up to the side of the street. “That will be one gold”

John reach into his pocket and pulls out a gold piece. “Here you go. Thanks for the lift.”

This part of town is geared to the high society. Grave’s suit blends him in to the scene as if he belonged to the upper levels of society. And his gait almost seems to prove it. Grave looking about him quickly takes in the area and begins walking down the street toward a night club that seems to quite popular. John walks up to the bouncer out front of The Six’s. “There a cover for this evening?”

The dragonborn looks Grave over and says, “Three gold to get in.”

John hands him the gold and the bouncer opens the door for into the club. Inside the club a full big band is playing, with a large dance floor filled with well dressed persons. To the side a polished bar. His palette for a good martini takes him directly to the bar. “A vesper martini.” The bartender throws together the drink a little sloppily and hands it to Grave. Tasting the drink John realizes that it is nowhere near the quality of the one he had earlier that evening.

“Can I get you anything else?” asks the bartender.

“I think that will be it for now. This is a very nice place. Who runs it? I’m somewhat new to town, you see.”

“That would be Larry Zieger.” John recognizes the name as that belonging to a Hayworth family capo. Grave also catches note of a gentleman packing a weapon in his jacket.

“Mr. Zieger wouldn’t be in tonight would he?”

“He does happen to be in tonight.”

“You wouldn’t happen to be kind enough as to point him out for me would you sir?” The bartender looks around for a moment then replies, “He doesn’t seem like he is out on the floor right now. But if you want to find him you can always ask his second. He’s right over there. His name is Arthur Jefferson.”

John looks over where the bartender is indicating. The gentleman being he is being referred to is none other than than the man carrying a hidden firearm. “Thank you, sir.” John walks over to Arthur Jefferson and introduces himself. “Good evening Mr. Jefferson. I’m John Grave. This is a great establishment your boss runs here.”

Arthur Jefferson turns to face Grave. He looks him over and is confident in Grave’s friendly manner. “That he does. Nice to meet you Mr. Grave.”

“Likewise Mr. Jefferson.”

“Anything I could do for you tonight? Something else you want that you can’t find at the bar?”

“I do have a terribly rude question to ask of a man I have just met. But is it possible I could speak with Mr. Zieger this evening?”

“What’s your business with him?”

“I know a man that is willing to provide inside information on various activities that compete with his boss’s business opportunities. Things that are best discussed in private and not on the open floor with ears always listening.”

“Well, then. That sounds like something he aught to hear. Wait here. I’ll go and speak with him.”

“Thank you Mr. Jefferson.” John steps back towards the bar to listen to the music and finish his haphazardly made drink. Moments later Jefferson comes back and leads John back into the office. John is lead into the back and into a nice office in which a man is seated behind a desk. “Good Evening, Mr. Zieger.”

“Good evening Mr. Grave. Arthur says you have some lucrative information.” Larry Zieger eyes the man before him carefully.

“It could be come very lucrative. At the moment, I am just representing a man looking to help out the…Family.”

Still uncertain of the man’s character, “You’ll have to excuse me if I don’t fully trust you right out. If you could get to the point I’ll decide if it would be helpful.”

“I represent a man from the bureau, looking to put an end to the Cartel’s business and help corner the market in favor of Mr. Hayworth. Earlier, the man I am represent destroyed a shipment of glittergold that would have crossed onto our shores.”

Zieger sits in silence for a moment staring at the Mr. Grave before him trying to decide what should be done. To create a new tie with like this would be highly dangerous.

“We heard rumblings about a shipment being lost and we do have an understanding with some of the more friendly member of the bureau. How are you representing the bureau?”

John Grave smiles, “My contact is an undercover operative by the name of Special Agent Frank Billinger.”

“Never heard of him, but there are a lot of people that work for the bureau that I don’t know about.”

“I expect that you haven’t heard much about him. He has been working strictly undercover for sometime and his employment with the Bureau has been kept under wraps.”

“Now you say that you can help us. I can pass this on to my bosses and see if they are interested in talking. I have a nice piece for myself, but what you are suggesting calls for higher up notice.”

“Wonderful news.”

“Well, then. I’ll talk with my bosses and we’ll get back to you Good evening Mr. Grave.”

“Thank you. Good evening to you as well Mr. Zieger.”

“Arthur, show our new acquaintance out.”




After resting Danger checks around in the dark for his clothes. It is odd that the underwear he picks up and puts on has a large hole in the back and is silky. He also picks up a dual cup slingshot that too is silky. With his new underwear and sports shirt, Danger sneaks out disappearing into the shadows. He gathers up some shadows trying to destroy the light near Dimtri’s door as he carefully and skillfully unlocks the door.

The room has much the same look as that of the other rooms Danger has entered on the upper level of the agency. The room has the look of little use, at least in the living room. The coat rack off to the side has a fairly cheap man’s coat and a woman’s hat. Danger smelling the hat finds the scent of vanilla.

“Vanilla, perhaps Smokey likes Ice Cream too?”

Danger throughly and carefully looks over Dimtri’s rooms. Nothing is found. It is almost as if Dimtri doesn’t live in these rooms. The bed was well made and the closet was empty. Even the refrigerator was empty. Not even a single dirty magazine was could be found under the bed or mattress. However in the bathroom a few things were found. Dimtri had several different bottles of shampoo and a few things in the medicine cabinet.

Having had his fill with this room. Danger slipped back out locking the door behind him. Slinking down the hall he picks the lock of the door to Leslie’s room. “It’s so messy in here, but the only thing better than fresh panties, is worn panties,” he whispers as he sniffs.

“Damn, you tape yourself Lez?”

Danger looks into her refrigerator and takes out a bottle of milk. Without regard for the expiration date Danger chugs the milk.

Finding a piece of paper and a pencil, Danger writes a letter of love to Leslie from Joe. My dearest Leslie, when did you fall from heaven? Because while your body’s divine, your face is rather fucked up. My vow of celibacy can only restrain my love so much, please give up that hunk of a man Danger to be with me. He’s awesome and totally epic I know, but we belong together, God said to me. Danger then slips out of the room as quietly as he came in slipping the letter under the once again locked door.




Danger awakes in Demi’s bed as Leslie busts down the door waving a sheet of paper in one hand and a sword in the other. “Woah, girl. What are you doing?” asks Demi sitting up in her bed.

“Fulfilling my fantasies!” exclaims Danger before Leslie gets a chance to respond.

“What’s this?!” questions Leslie in a rage wave the paper all the more violently in her hand. “You damn well know this is from you!”

“Joe’s spirit guided my hand!” cries Danger. “The power of Christ compelled me!!!”

“Stand up! Over here!” Leslie motions with her sword. Danger attempts to make a break for it managing to get by Leslie and into the main room still wearing women’s lingerie. “Oh no! You are not getting away!” Leslie moves after him and blocks Danger’s escape through the door. Not to be out done he once again makes it around Leslie and down the hall to hide in the stair case shadows. “You sneaky little bastard. Where are you?”

Father Joseph while preparing himself for the day hears the commotion and comments out loud to himself, “Sounds like everyone is quite lively today…”

Danger slips down the stair case and across the main room of the first floor to hide under Dorthy’s desk. John Grave, doesn’t notice Danger’s entrance, sits quietly enjoying a fresh up cup of tea and the comfort of one of the leather chairs. Leslie comes barreling down the stairs and exclaims, “There you are!” as she spots Danger’s silky ass hanging outside the desk.

“Good morning, Le—What the bloody hell happened now?”

Leslie charges across the room stabbing Danger in the ass. “Say you’re sorry!”

“Honestly what did he do? Have sex with you in your sleep?”

“That’s a great idea!” yells Danger has he extricates himself out from under the desk and away from Leslie. Leslie let out a howl of anger at Danger and swings at him as he attempts to get by. Slashing Danger’s dead flesh.

“Oh dear me. I think I said something I shouldn’t have,” says John as he sips on his tea. Not letting the excitement overwhelm him or get involved for that matter.

“You apologize and maybe I won’t gut you!”

“Well, I guess it can’t be all to bad since she is asking him to apologize,” comments John to himself.

From his new hiding place Danger exclaims uncontrollably, “I do not apologize!”

“There you are!” Leslie shouts as Danger gives himself away. She charges at him again, but this time Danger manages to extricate himself acrobatically avoiding the sharp steel of Leslie’s blade. “Slippery deadhead.” Danger pulls down a bookcase as he darts back out the door an into the main room where John sits. He then darts back up the stairs heading straight for Father Joseph’s room.

Leslie manages not to be crushed by the bookcase and comes back out into the main room. She looks around and gasps, “Lost him again. Did you see where he went?”

Knowing that his could get messy and it needed to be defused quickly John replied, “I think he ran out the door. The bloke was moving quite fast. What did he do to you?”

“Out the door? Good.” Leslie rushes for the door, but before she gets there the door opens and Dimtri walks in.

“Leslie, what’s the rush? You look out of breath and what is with the swords?”

John laughs, “I think our dear friend Danger went a little too far with his practical jokes. That’s all. Right Ms. Leslie?”

“Yes. I was just looking to beat some sense into him,” agrees Leslie attempting to calm down a little and straighten herself out a bit.

“Danger seems like the type to do that. But you are a professional. Let’s talk in my office about this,” Dimtri says looking hard into here eyes.

Leslie folds her arms, “Yes, sir.”




Danger nimbly opens the door to Joseph’s room panting heavily. Father looks at Danger saying, “You know…knocking works too. Is something the matter, or can I assume all the excitement this morning is your fault?”

“Just needing a hiding spot. I never knew how hard it was to hide in this place,” Danger explains between pants.

“Hiding…from who?”

“Oh, like my new look?” Pointing to his head, “These are Lez’s,” and striking a pose, “These are Demi’s.”

Father Joseph shakes his head saying, “Something tells me…Demi wouldn’t care…and Leslie is after you no.”

“I game her your confession last night, but she apparently doesn’t return to favor.”

Father Joseph stands there quietly for a moment. “You did what? What confession?”

“I gave this romantic letter proposing the love between you two, trying to tell her to give up on me. She’s obviously heartbroken.”

“Seems innocent enough. What not just talk to her? Hiding seems…childish?”

“I cannot console her broken heart.”

“Or I could talk to her…but sometimes you don’t seem to know when to stop joking. Of course you could say I don’t know when to start.”

“Oh would you? I think she needs some Christian comforting,” Danger winks.

“I’m afraid you will be disappointed, my comfort is of the spiritual kind only. Speaking of however…did you enjoy your evening with Demi?”

“I won. Danger never loses a rematch!”

From out in the hall the two men hear Demi, “Danger! Leslie! What’s going on?!”

“Winning that, but losing the battle with Leslie I see. Well you can stay in here for a bit, I’ll find Leslie.”




Demi descends the stairs into the main area of the agency. Her body uncovered. John chokes a bit on his coffee as he sees the tiefling. “Good morning, Demi. You look enchanting. Sparing nothing in modesty I see.”

At that moment Father Joseph makes it down the stairs. “Good morning Mr. Grave. Did you get entangled in the mornings excitement?” Danger peeks out from staircase and Demi catches note. “Oh there you are.” Demi looks him over, “So you’re into that sort of thing…Well I can get into that, we just need to get you a pair of your own. Mine are expensive.”

“Oh it was quite the scene down here this morning. I almost thought to intervene, but decided I would rather save a suit,” replies John.

“How serious are we talking?”

“Oh Ms. Leslie was running around with her sword drawn. I think she got Danger in the arse once,” chuckles John.

“Dear me.”

Demi turns to Father, “Good morning churchman. Shack up with anyone last night?” She asks with a grin on her face.

“I only shack with the choir invisible,” answers Joseph with a wink.

“Uh…what is all the commotion?” asks Dino as he pulls himself up from where he fell asleep on the large table. Danger waves at the yawning halfing.

“Hmm…So…which way did Leslie go?”

Clearing the sleep from his eyes Dino sees a naked undead and tiefling. He is utterly disgusted by the sight of Danger. “Ah don’t scare a man like that so early.”

John finishes his tea saying, “Ah she is speaking with Mr. Dimtri. It sounded very official. I’m not too sure Dimtri is in a good mood today.”

“Ah I see. Well things have not been too smoothly lately. I don’t think this morning helped.” The sound of an opening door grabs the rooms attention as Dimtri enters with Leslie. “Good morning Leslie, Dimtri.” Danger starts some morning kalisthetics.

“Alright Danger, I’ll let that slid. Sorry for the stabbing. But you go to far again and I can’t promise anything. And good morning to you Father.”

“You stabbed him? Hmm… That sounds a bit…excessive.” Father Joseph looks over Danger’s highly visible body to find the wounds.

John getting disgusted with the sight of Danger, “Danger, could you go and put some trousers on? It’s a terrible sight to have to behold this early in the morning.”

“Oh one second John.” He slips Leslie’s frilly underwear off his head making an effort to put them on. Father Joseph quickly grabs the article in question away from Danger and hands them over to Leslie.

“If I’m not mistaken, he did mention these might be yours,” says Joseph as he leans in close to whisper.

“Well now I’ve got nothing to wear, be back in a moment. And apology accepted Leslie,” Danger says laughing manically at who apologized to who.

Dimtri looking a bit annoyed, “So are you kids done having your fun? Are you read to do some actual work or am I wasting my time?”

“I am quite ready to do work,” replies Father Joseph.

“Wasting time I think not. What is the plan for today?” questions John.

“The picket lines are in need of holding, correct?” responds Joseph.

“Yes, the next work shift starts at 8 o’clock. Time is of the essence. We don’t want to disappoint a client.”

“I am ready to move out.”

“As am I,” agrees John with Leslie’s agreement quickly following. “Oh Mr. Dimtri. I may be receiving a package here at some point. I would be much appreciated if it was left alone until I get back. It’s something of a personal nature.” John takes in Dimtri’s behavior and overall stance trying to gleam anything from him. “If that is alright?”

“I’ll inform Dorothy. Good luck with finding transportation. I think the train goes directly there for the works. You can catch it if you’re lucky. Excuse me. And Dino, get this mess cleaned up NOW!” Dimtri leaves the large room heading back into the back of the building.

Danger comes back down the stairs after Dimtri leaves the room. “Well, we should be off then.”

Tales of Gangsters and Goblins
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Chapter 2 – Scooby Snacks? In Your Coffee, Maybe…

Chapter One

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